Do You Need To Clean Out Your Communication Filters?
Former presidential speechwriter James Humes is often quoted as saying, “The art of communication is the language of leadership.” I wholeheartedly agree that effective communication is an art form—and a soft skill that leaders must develop.
How ‘Filters’ Shape How We Receive Communication
One set of obstacles to clear communication is our own individual filters by which we both convey and process information. Our personal experiences and upbringing help shape the development of our communication style and perception of the world. These filters differ from person to person, and in any given office setting—especially a diverse workplace with different nationalities, economic backgrounds and generations all working together—there are countless experiences represented.
As an example, my client, whom I’ll call Lauren, runs a team of women from the Gen-Z and Millennial generations. She takes pride in their success and likes to take them under her wing, offering feedback to help guide them in their projects and tasks. Her intention is to boost their confidence and careers. She did not have a mentor in her formative years and would have liked one. So, she tries to use her own experience and expertise to uplift her team. However, one of her mentees did not take Lauren’s criticism well and began to resent the feedback.
After analyzing the situation, Lauren realized that this mentee came from a previous workplace that prioritized perfectionism and productivity. When Lauren provided constructive feedback, the mentee interpreted the message as a negative opinion of her work and a criticism of her performance and abilities. Once Lauren understood the filter through which the mentee was processing this information, she was able to change how she communicated; she even openly discussed with the mentee that her feedback was meant to uplift, not bring her down. Once she received that reassurance, the mentee was able to adjust her communication filter and start receiving Lauren’s guidance in a more gracious and open way.
Beware Of Cloudy Filters
This type of breakdown in communication happens all the time. Cloudy filters or dust from the past can distort our perception of interactions on a daily basis. A woman who was bullied by the popular girls in high school might be wary of anything a pretty or “popular” officemate says to her. An extrovert might think that the guy with glasses is rude because he never greets her in the hallway; really, he is a shy introvert for whom small talk is difficult. A colleague might feel slighted by coworkers who show up a few minutes late to her meetings because punctuality was a sign of respect in her family, and tardiness was a sign of disrespect.
Each of these people comes with “cloudy filters,” applying past experiences to present-day situations. While the past is valuable, and sometimes these filters are accurate and helpful, sometimes they need to be examined, addressed and dusted off.
Leaders: Examine Your Own Filters
To practice the art of communication, leaders should examine their own filters. What past experiences are shaping how we receive information? What feelings keep popping up in certain situations that might be indicative of our own filters? Have there been encounters with colleagues where we were unable to see eye to eye, and how might our filter have been a part of that inability to communicate? Maybe things that have been said (or have gone unsaid) were interpreted in a different way than they were intended.
By understanding that these communication filters exist in all of us, leaders are in a better position to examine and possibly readjust their language and communication strategies to both receive input without unintentional biases as well as better provide clear messaging to others in the workplace.